Negotiation, Communication and
Body Language Strategies

“You’re Never Totally Eclipsed When Negotiating” – Negotiation Infographic Tip

 

When you feel eclipsed in a negotiation, consider rethinking, reshaping, repositioning your thoughts. Feeling eclipsed is akin to feeling like you’ve slipped into a dark phase of the negotiation. Truth be known, negotiations go through an ebb and flow. Thus, with a shifting of your perspective, you can view your situation as being more enlightening. Doing so will allow you to focus more on the positive aspects of the negotiation, which will allow you to see yourself as not being eclipsed but instead in the full light of opportunity.

Take note of today’s negotiation infographic tip and if you heed its content, you’ll never view yourself as being eclipsed again.

 

Youre Never Totally Eclipsed When Negotiating

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Negotiation Infographic Tip and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

Sunday Negotiation Insight”

 

“Don’t resist growth. It’s happening all the time. Grow with it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up

 

“What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up”

 

What do you want to be when you grow up? Remember people asking you that when you were a kid? How are you doing with becoming whatever you thought you’d be?

As kids, we’re not really sure what the world is all about. Thus, we seek to become what appears to be exciting, flashy, and prestigious. Then, as we grow older we become more circumspective. We start to conform to society’s norms and we discover what we’re good at. We go through that iteration multiple times throughout our lives as more is revealed about our abilities.

Truth be known, we never stop growing. Since the world continues to move (i.e. new technologies, methods to accomplish goals, etc.) we move with it.

So, as you go about answering the question, what do you want to be when you grow up, you might consider rephrasing it. Instead, you might ask, what do you want to be at some point in your life and what will that point look like? Then, assess what you’ll have to do to get to that point. Question the skills you’ll need and how you’ll obtain them. Realizing that you’ll pose such questions many times throughout your life should give you peace of mind, knowing that you’re always in transition. Thus, you’re not who you were yesterday and you’re not who you’ll be tomorrow. You are who you’ve made yourself into today by answering the question, what do I want to be when I grow up.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

First, you’re always negotiating (i.e. what you do today influences what occurs tomorrow). As such, the goals you set for the negotiation is a conglomerate of what you’ve experienced in becoming who you are. Stated simply, the negotiation is influenced by your perspective. Thus, while you’re negotiating you’ll do so from all of the hopes and let-downs you’ve experienced in the past. That’s something to be mindful of since it’ll play a pivotal role in your decision making.

Suffice it to say, even if you’re grown, you’re still growing; you’re not complete. Grow your negotiation skills every day. That’s not a plug to say you should do so by buying my products. I’m not that shallow!

Once you grow your negotiation skills, you’ll discover more opportunities will avail themselves to you. That’s because you’ll know how to achieve more of what you want. That will allow you to grow stronger and faster in life … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Hate Can Lead To The Death of a Negotiation” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“We have to make it past the darkness, so we can work together and be happy again.” -3-year old descendent of Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

Hate Can Lead To The Death of a Negotiation

 

 

“Hate Can Lead To The Death of a Negotiation”

 

Have you ever been so engulfed by hate when negotiating that you couldn’t think straight? Later, in a more calmer state of mind, you thought about responses you could have given that would have made the negotiation more palatable, more pleasant, more amenable per the outcome you sought. You’re wise enough to know, hate can lead to the death of a negotiation. You can prevent hate from hijacking your mind when negotiating by doing the following.

 

Forethoughts:

  • Hate is a very strong emotion.

Hate clouds the mind and thus the judgment of your decisions. That being a truism, you should know what triggers a shift in your emotional state of mind; that shift should be known from a good and bad perspective. Having such insights and being able to control them will give you greater control during the negotiation.

 

 

  • Be mindful not to view the other negotiator through a tainted lens.

Have you ever viewed someone through the lens of expectation? You may have thought, she’s just like ‘x’; I know what she’s like. The residue of your expectations will color your perspective of that person. Meanwhile, the person may not be anything like what you expected.

When you view the other negotiator through a tainted lens, you lose your ability to be subjective. Doing that can lead to misperceptions of intent, which in turn can turn the negotiation into a dark dead-end alley that eventually leads to the death of the negotiation.

 

  • Know your mind and that of the other negotiator.

Everyone is an individual. While many people may have similar thoughts that cause them to be viewed similarly, if you note the nuances that differentiate that person from his identified group, you can see the differences that person possesses from the group. To do so, you must know his mind and how he thinks. The same must also be true about you; you should understand what motivates you to adopt a particular action over another, and who you’re with when doing so. Such insights will give you a greater understanding of the psychological forces that motivate you and the other negotiator. Once identified, you’ll also have greater insights into the mental levers of psychological power you can use to manipulate yourself and him during the negotiation.

 

Be empathic:

  • Be willing to discuss emotions, while keeping an open mind.

Knowing you’re different from others is to know that they have their differences. If you keep an open mind, you’ll be capable of understanding the other negotiator. Thus, you can state at the beginning of the negotiation that you know he and you may see things differently, but you’re willing to enter into the negotiation with an open mind; be sure that you get his buy-in to do the same.

 

  • Know when it’s time to walk away.

Let’s be realistic. Due to the mindset of some people, you may not be able to reach an amicable outcome in a negotiation. Although you may empathize with someone’s perspective, know when to walk away; don’t be belligerent as you do. Always attempt to be respectful, understanding that a negotiation may reconvene at another time. As such, don’t poison the future with incendiary words today.

 

Sometimes a slammed door is the opening sound of opportunity. When you slam the door on hate in your negotiations you’ll be opening a door through which understanding can enter … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Better Combat Zero-Sum Negotiators” – Negotiation Infographic Tip

The only way some negotiators feel they can win is for you to lose. They have a zero-sum view of the negotiation. Negotiating with such a person can be more challenging than one that doesn’t have that mindset.

Observe the quick strategies you can employ to combat such a negotiator in this week’s negotiation infographic tip.

 

How To Better Combat ZeroSum Negotiators

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Negotiation Infographic Tip and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Are You Talking Too Much” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

 

“Sunday Negotiation Insight”

 

“Talk less, listen more, learn more.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

Are You Talking Too Much

 

“Are You Talking Too Much”

 

Do you talk too much? Once I had a friend that thought her greatest asset was others hearing the sound of her voice; FYI, she was not a singer. She was delusional in thinking the more she talked, the more impressed others were of her. She was wrong. Worse, she turned a lot of people off and she never knew it.

 

When you listen to others you discover what’s important to them. You also gain insight into their thought process, what they place importance on, and what they value the most. If you also observe their body language while they’re speaking and compare their actions to their words, they’ll validate what is important to them; whatever we engage in by definition is more important to us (i.e. you’re spending time doing that thing).

 

When you’re engaged in a conversation, listen with your ears and your eyes. What you see will add or detract from the words you hear. Don’t be predisposed thinking about your retort. You might miss vital signs that could alter the message you’re receiving. That can be the difference between getting closer to someone or pushing them further away.

Once you begin listening more intently, you’ll gain more insight into people, which will allow you to understand them better … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

In order to be a good negotiator, you must be very attuned to the words used by the other negotiator and how she communicates those words. If instead of observing that you’re contemplating your rebuttal, you’ll miss insights that might have taken the negotiation in a different direction.

To listen better in your negotiations:

  • Observe the words used by the other negotiator; as an example, ‘we’ conveys a different message than ‘I’, or ‘they’.

 

  • Maintain focus on the pace of speech of the other negotiator; decreased or accelerated speaking will be punctuated by something that caused the alteration. Make sure you know why such occurred.

 

  • Observe body language signals that lend or detract from a message; someone leaning away from a statement can indicate disinterest, even if the opposite is stated in words.

You’ll always learn more when you listen more and talk less in a negotiation. So, talk less and hear more of what you’ve been missing.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Bullying Can Be Scary But Good When Negotiating” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“One way to defeat a bully is to disallow support of his efforts.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

Bullying Can Be Scary But Good When Negotiating

 

“Bullying Can Be Scary But Good When Negotiating”

 

Have you ever felt bullied when negotiating? Did you find it scary? Bullying can be scary when negotiating but it can also be good. It all depends on which side you’re on.

The following are thoughts you can implement to project the persona of a bully when negotiating, along with how to thwart a bully’s efforts if you’re the target of bullying.

 

Good Cop – Bad Cop

This tactic is old, tired, and used excessively, and yet it still works. When you know the opposing negotiators are using this tactic, call them on it. Tell them that you know what they’re doing and ask if they’d like to change the tone of the negotiation. If they dismiss your accusation as folly and/or refuse to alter their tactics call your own bad cop into the negotiation. If you’re forced to do so, make sure your bad cop is bigger and bolder than their bad cop.

 

Negotiating with subordinates can suck.

Be on guard when negotiating with the other negotiator’s subordinates. This can be the setup for the good cop – bad cop tactic and/or used to soften you up. Some negotiation teams will use several layers of subordinates for you to negotiate against; this process can also be a mild form of bullying because you’re being mentally manipulated throughout the negotiation process. If you suspect you’ll be in such a situation, set time frames for how long you’ll negotiate. Don’t spend more time than you’ve allotted in any one aspect of the negotiation. You want to get to the real power source that you’ll eventually be negotiating with as quickly as possible.

 

Know the target of a bully’s negotiation efforts.

Have you ever felt used? Most people have at some point in their life. When negotiating, there will be times when you’re not the end target of someone that’s attempting to bully you. Instead, the bully will be positioning himself for a potential negotiation confrontation with another entity; that’s another reason I say you’re always negotiating.

You can gain clues regarding whether you’re the intended target by observing if the bully appears to be committing overkill on his pronouncements, or if his behavior seems to be over-the-top. Once again, bring your perspective to his attention and note any change that occurs after that. If he continues to be obstinate, leave him to negotiate with himself. Never place yourself in an unintended position where you must subjugate yourself to his bullying efforts to obtain what you need.

 

Leave the back door open.

Always leave a back door through which you or the other negotiator can escape to save face. When negotiating with a bully, that back door can be in the form of you bringing in a different negotiator, a bully of your own; therein lies how you can also use the good cop bad cop tactic.

 

As you can tell, bullying can be scary when negotiating, but you can turn a bully’s efforts against him and use his tactics to your advantage. The next time you’re in a negotiation, understand what the bully’s intent is, who he’s posturing for, and what his real efforts are geared to obtain. Having that information in your repertoire will allow you to address the negotiation more adroitly … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“The Subconscious Value of Happiness in Negotiations” – Negotiation Infographic Tip

In your negotiations, consider the value of happiness. That means, think about how you can alter your mind per how you value situations and make them serve you and the goals you have for the negotiation; consider how you can put the other negotiator into a more positive state of mind, too.

The reason you should consider your state of happiness and that of the other negotiator is because the negotiation will flow easier to the degree that both of you are happy. Thus, if you know what makes you happy and how to summon that sensation you’ll be able to tap into it. Doing the same for the other negotiator will give you subconscious powers in the negotiation.

Observe the Negotiation Infographic Tip for more insight.

 

The Subconscious Value of Happiness in Negotiations

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Negotiation Infographic Tip and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Empathy Doesn’t Cost A Thing In Life Or Negotiations” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

 

Sunday Negotiation Insight”

 

“Empathy is mentally transporting yourself into the thoughts of another for the purpose of truly understanding that person.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

Empathy Doesnt Cost A Thing In Life Or Negotiations

 

“Empathy Doesn’t Cost A Thing In Life Or Negotiations”

 

I’m in a hurry; get out of my way. Those were the sentiments I had recently while driving for an appointment that I suspected I’d be late for. Traffic had come to a dead halt and I was fuming! Come on, come on, I thought. Then, I saw the cause of the delay; it was a funeral procession. Instantly, a tidal wave of guilt washed over me. There I was in a hurry to get to an appointment, stuck in traffic that had come to a dead halt, while someone else was dead, going to their final appointment. I thought, empathy doesn’t cost a thing, as I empathized with a person that I didn’t know and reflected on what the family must be going through.

We give meaning to our daily occurrences and those meanings determine how we see ourselves, as we view our activities through the lens of those daily occurrences.

As you rush through life, be sure what you’re interpreting has significant meaning to you; one day you too will be heading for your final appointment. It’s the significance of those meanings that will become the reflections others will have of you when recounting your life’s meaning.

Live your life with a sense of empathy for others. In so doing, you’ll be shaping the destiny that you’ll be most proud of. People will remember you for that, which is exactly what you will have sought.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

In order to appreciate the other negotiator’s position, you need to see things from her perspective. The best way to do that is to have empathy for her and her position. Having empathy doesn’t mean that you place yourself in a vulnerable position. Quite the opposite, it will allow you to be perceived as a more venerable person. Empathy will also allow you to be more creative if you should reach what appears to be an impasse; that’s because trust will be the perceived arbiter for your actions. Empathy will allow you to be seen from a more understanding perspective, which will ward off potential impasses. Such senses from both of you should allow the negotiation to flow more smoothly. That will make reaching a consensus easier … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

Continue...

Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Use Preconditions To Win More Negotiations” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“The preconditions you set upon others to engage with you determines who will engage with you. Use preconditions for the value they possess.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Use Preconditions To Win More Negotiations”

 

How much thought have you given to using preconditions to win more negotiations before you enter into a negotiation? Preconditions are an integral aspect of negotiations because they set the stage for the negotiation. Thus, preconditions indicate what will have more importance during the flow of the negotiation. They also give insight per how the other negotiator may engage in the negotiation.

Since preconditions make the negotiation easier or harder, observe the following to see how you can use preconditions as a tool to win more of your negotiations.

 

Give meaningful thought to who the power players might be.

When you’re at the negotiation table, you may not be negotiating with the real decision makers. You may be negotiating with someone that can only take the negotiation to a certain level.

Being able to discern who the power players are in a negotiation can be achieved during the preconditioning stage by citing covenants that exceed your counterparts’ authority. The way to uncover this facet is to ask probing questions about his conditions to negotiate. Then, include exceeding components in your precondition and observe what he does with them. If he states he has to refer to another source, you’ll have insight into his authority and/or to whom he might refer for such insights.

 

Set the stage for the negotiation to follow.

Preconditions allow you to probe the real points of interest that the other negotiator has. To use them in this manner, consider what he may wish or not wish to discuss. Then, based on the outcome you seek for the negotiation, include or exclude those items that you’d like to get a reaction on from him.

To glean greater insight into his perspective, observe how he responds verbally and nonverbally to the covenants of the conditions. Of particular, note if he places more emphasis on any particular aspect. That will be a clue to the importance he has the aspect.

Be mindful that he may place an emphasis on one aspect to draw your attention away from something that’s more important to him. If you suspect

that he’s doing this, state it differently, alter its perspective, and present it from another point of view. Do this until you’re satisfied that the point has significance to him. For the points that he doesn’t comment on, pose questions to him as to why he hasn’t made comments about them. Remember, you’re attempting to gather information about what’s important to him. So, probe until you’re satisfied that you understand the value he’s placing on as many aspects of your preconditions as possible.

 

Be circumspective upon the completion of your preconditioning document.

In particular, assess what might go or not go the way you’ve planned. Seek to make this document the tool that sets the tone and implementation of your total plan for the negotiation. It should be your driving force behind the negotiation. Here’s a truism; it will definitely serve that purpose because you will have actually begun the negotiation.

After you’ve completed this document, go over it several times. Consider where you might increase it and your viability in the negotiation to follow.

 

Some negotiators won’t/don’t recognize the value that preconditions possess. They really are powerful if used properly because you get to paint the picture in which the other negotiator views you. Plus, you get to put that picture in the frame (positioning) that suits you best.

To increase your negotiation win rate, use positioning as the viable tool that it can be … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“To Negotiate Better Watch Your Mind” – Negotiation Infographic Tip

To negotiate better, you must be mindful of the way you think. The way you think will influence how you perceive offers and counter offers. In addition, your interpretation of what you perceive will lead you to adopt actions that are beneficial or nonbeneficial to your cause during the negotiation. As such, your mental perspective in any endeavor is paramount to the degree of success you’ll encounter.

Consider the information in this week’s Negotiation Infographic Tip as a basis to conduct your thought process in a negotiation.

 

To Negotiate Better Watch Your Mind

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Negotiation Infographic Tip and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,