Posts tagged "strategies to combat dealing with difficult people"

“How To Use Reverse Questioning To Win More Negotiations” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“The degree of success you experience in life and in negotiations is based to a degree on asking the right questions successfully.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Use Reverse Questioning To Win More Negotiations”

 

You no doubt know what reverse engineering is, right? Reverse questioning in a negotiation is the process of identifying the questions you need to ask in order to obtain the answers that will lead to a successful negotiation outcome. It’s also a way to identify how you’ll control the flow of the negotiation.

As a quick example, if you wanted to exit a negotiation paying $1,000 for a product you’d work from the outcome sought back to the beginning of the negotiation; you might also consider working back from that point to how you would position yourself prior to entering into the negotiation. To perform the latter, you’d assess the requirements needed (i.e. how you’d position yourself) to have your persona projected in a certain light/manner.

 

The following is what the step-by-step process would look like.

 

  1. Identify the most and least favorable outcome you’ll seek from the negotiation, along with why you’ve identified those points of juxtaposition. As a benefit, having that insight will help you identify exit points from the negotiation.

 

  1. Assemble a list of questions that might be asked of you as you would go through the negotiation.

 

  1. Create answers to the questions posed in step 2 that are needed to drive your efforts towards a winning negotiation outcome, while formulating questions you’ll ask to keep the negotiation on track; these will be your defensive questions. Identify points where you can answer a question with a question; remember, the person asking the questions is the person controlling the negotiation. That’s due to the fact, that person is gaining more information.

 

  1. Once you create and address step 3, create a list of questions that you might ask of the other negotiator that’s separate from the ones you might use to respond to his questions; these will become your offensive questions. Offensive questions are questions that move your negotiation efforts quicker towards the end of the negotiation; they are questions that the other negotiator has to agree with because they’re based on what he’s previously stated as his beliefs or truths; you’ll be weaponizing his thoughts and questions against him. Some of these questions will also come in the form of questions that answer questions.

 

  1. Assess how the opposing negotiator might respond to your scenario.

 

  1. Continue going over steps 1 through 5, in an attempt to uncover additional questions that you’d not considered that need to be included in the process.

 

  1. Once you feel you’ve honed the questions to a point that the other negotiator has to follow a prescribed path that you’ve created for the negotiation, test your hypothesis in a mock negotiation. This will allow your questioning process to become more refined and may uncover better/additional questions.

 

  1. Once you feel totally prepared to utilize your questions in a negotiation, do so. Engage with the confidence in knowing that you’ve created a stealthy way of capturing better information as you go throughout the negotiation.

 

  1. Save your questions in a repository to be used for comparison to past and future negotiation situations.

 

The wrong question asked at the right time in a negotiation may do incalculable harm. The wrong question asked at the wrong time in a negotiation may lead to a negotiation impasse. Create and test your questions before entering into a negotiation and you’ll have more of a chance to reach a successful negotiation outcome … and everything will be right with the world.

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Bully #Question #psychology

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Really Overcome A Bully Before Negotiating” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“A bully is a misguided person with perceived power. Extinguish his sources of power and you extinguish the bully.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Really Overcome A Bully Before Negotiating”

 

Do you know how to really overcome a bully before negotiating with him? There you are. You’re negotiating against a bully! He’s someone that’s willing to lie, cheat, and steal to come out ahead in the negotiation. You think to yourself, ‘what can I do? This son-of-a-gun is not playing fair and I don’t know how to overcome him!’ The answer to, ‘what can I do’ was hidden in what occurred before the negotiation began.

The following insights will allow you to position yourself better to overcome a bully’s ploys before you negotiate with him.

 

Positioning:

In every negotiation, positioning occurs. It’s shown in the way the negotiators perceive each other and themselves. Thus, positioning is important because it determines how negotiators will interact with one another.

If you know you’ll be negotiating against someone that has bullied others in the past, before entering into the negotiation, attempt to discover the demeanor of those individuals. In particular seek to define whether they were perceived to be weak by your opponent due to their short-comings, or if your opponent felt empowered due to some other factor(s) he had going for himself at the time of the negotiation(s). That information will allow you to best position yourself from a position of strength. A bully’s loathing for weakness is the reason he only picks on targets that he perceives to be weak.

 

 

Leverage: (ploys you can employ when negotiating with a bully)

Using Other people

All bullies look up to someone. If you can find a way to curry favor with the bully’s icon, you can supplant his bullying efforts against you. After all, the bully wants an easy target. If the bully’s icon has favored you, that makes you less of a target to the bully.

Bully’s weakness

All bullies have an Achilles heel. It may be how they wish to be perceived by others. It may also appear in the form of the bully being perceived in one light versus another. Whatever it is, discover it and be prepared to exploit it during the negotiation if such is called for.

Bully’s Persona (his vanity)

If you’re aware of the pride a bully takes in having himself perceived in a certain light, attempt to alter that light; have it shine on someone or somewhere else. You will have taken away his source of motivation. Hold it hostage until he dismantles his bullying ways. The point is, hit him where you’ll get the most attention and where it will hurt him the most. Remember, he despises weakness and applauds strength.

 

Be Stealthy:

Every good negotiator gathers information about the opposing negotiator. When you know you’ll be negotiating against a bully, drip misinformation into places that he seeks to gather information about you. The better you can use such information to misguide him, the more difficult it’ll be for him to assess the type of negotiator you are; always be willing to display a different negotiation demeanor based on the opposing negotiator.

 

When engaging a bully in a negotiation, there are all kinds of mind games that occur. Utilize the insights above and you’ll be in a better mental state than the bully. The better you play the game, the greater the chance that you’ll be able to overcome a bully when negotiating … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here http://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Bully

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Uncategorized, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Exploit Misinformation And Disinformation When Negotiating” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Misinformation is the unintended representation of alternative facts. Disinformation is the attempt to mentally make you compete against yourself.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Exploit Misinformation And Disinformation When Negotiating”

 

In most negotiations, some form of misinformation is conveyed. That can occur in the form of disinformation, which may or may not be considered misinformation. The way you and the other negotiator perceives the differences between the two determines the path of the negotiation.

“… but I don’t lie!” The person making such a pronouncement, more than likely, just lied to you.

This article delves into how to exploit and use disinformation when negotiating and how you might also consider using misinformation as leverage to enhance your negotiation position.

 

Misinformation:

While misinformation (i.e. information cited wrong, unintentional representation of the facts, information omitted, etc.) can be disheartening in a negotiation, it can be forgiven if the information was not delivered with malice and/or the intent of drastically dissuading you from your negotiation plan. That’s the marked difference between misinformation and disinformation.

 

Disinformation:

Disinformation is the clandestine intent to influence an action that makes you question not only what the truth is, but it also makes you question yourself per the validity of your thoughts. That can be devastating in a negotiation. In such a scenario you’re not really sure what reality is. Thus, you negotiate based on the ghosts you’ve assembled in your mind. That’s like helping the other negotiator negotiate against you.

 

How To Advantage Your Position:

  1. Verify whether misinformation or disinformation is being employed against you. This can be accomplished by knowing the facts before assembling at the negotiation table. More than likely there’s a mixture of the two. In that case, discern which is more prevalent by asking the opposing negotiator to provide the source(s) of his information. It’s very important to make that request because the rest of your strategy will flow from that point.

 

  1. Seek to catch him in a situation where you know his information is suspect at best and false at worse. If you know he’s ‘on-the- ropes’ while trying to defend himself, let him stew and observe his body language (i.e. perspiring, touching his face, rubbing his hands, etc.) Those will be signs of his uneasiness with the position he’s in.

 

  1. Challenge him by asking his perception of the truth and to what degree he’s being forthright with you. Based on his response, assess to what degree you’re willing to continue in the negotiation. Definitively state that you won’t tolerate any form of mistruths. Let him know that trust hangs in the balance and the only way you’ll continue is if you can trust him.

 

  1. Understand that the preceding strategy has a maximum effect when you’re in a power position in the negotiation. Therefore, consideration should be given to the degree of power you have and how it’s perceived by the other negotiator before you attempt to implement it.

 

With a premium being placed on the truth in a negotiation, you might question why a negotiator would convey some aspects of information and omit others. The answer may lie in how far he’ll go to get a negotiation deal and the possible deceit he’ll engage in to accomplish that goal. Thus, the more you probe to uncover his hidden agenda, his source(s) of motivation, the greater insight you’ll gain into the mind that operates his actions. Once discovered, you can become his puppet master, controlling him and the flow of the negotiation. That will align you for the negotiation win … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com   or at (609) 369-2100.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #Disinformation

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Get Better Insider Information When Negotiating” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Good information is only as good as its source and how it’s used. Always assess the validity of the information you receive to determine its best use and application.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

When negotiating, insider information is a valuable commodity. Getting better insider information when negotiating is even better!

Consider using the following strategies to acquire insider information in your negotiations.

 

  • Time:

Depending on the time you have to gather information, consider how you’ll pose questions to yourself and stakeholders that will be beneficial to your negotiation efforts (Note: Keep in mind that the questions you ask will determine the answers you receive; that in turn will determine the strategies you adopt. If you pose the wrong questions, you’ll start upon a path in the negotiation that might be less beneficial). Asking the right questions entails knowing the outcome you seek, how you might achieve it, the roadblocks you may encounter, and what alternative strategies you’ll employ to overcome impediments that would preclude you from achieving your goals. Also, keep in mind that the quality of the answers you receive will depend on when you pose questions. If someone is hurried, less rested, or filled with angst, they may be prone to disclosing insider information simply because they’re not as guarded as they might otherwise be.

 

  • Assumptive Questions:

In your assessment of what questions you’ll utilize to maximize your negotiation efforts, consider how you’ll employ assumptive questions; in a negotiation, assumptive questions are questions that give the façade that the questioner knows more about the situation that he’s inquiring about (e.g. ‘You’ve given discounts to other buyers in the past, correct?’ The implication being that you’re aware, right or wrong, that discounts have been granted in the past).

Assumptive questions are excellent ways to gather information. Even if the responder states that your assumption is wrong you will have gathered additional information/insight.

 

  • Body Language/Nonverbal Clues:

When in person, observe to what degree the person leans closer or further away when pondering an answer to your question(s); this will give insight as to whether they’re embracing or putting distance between you and their answer. Leaning away can indicate that they don’t wish to engage, which can imply that they don’t want to disclose the answer to your question. Leaning forward can imply that they’re willing to engage. Note how and when they lean.

If you’re on the phone, listen for intonations, pauses, and emotions displayed. Take note of the words that emphases are placed on, too. Such will bear noting for the possible hidden messages contained in them.

To practice and increase your listening skills, close your eyes while speaking with someone on the phone. Toss a question that’s not generic to the conversation and listen to the response. In particular, take note of how long the other person pauses before responding, their intonation, voice quality (i.e. puzzled), and the follow-up question(s) they raise as to the timing of your question. Then, ask for the thoughts they had when you asked the question. Over time, you’ll become better at deciphering the thoughts and thought processes of others.

 

To acquire insider information that can be used to your benefit in a negotiation, know what questions to ask, the best time to ask them, and how to validate the responses you receive. By implementing the strategy of gathering and using insider information in your negotiations you’ll increase your negotiation win rate … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com   or at (609) 369-2100.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #InsiderInformation

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“What Is The Best Way To Win Negotiations” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“To win more negotiations, assess and then prepare for the variables that will have the most influence on the negotiation. That’s true in negotiations and life.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“What Is The Best Way To Win Negotiations”

 

As a negotiation advisor, I’m often asked, “What is the best way to win negotiations?” My response is, it depends. It depends on many factors. Factors like, what you do before the negotiation, the negotiation environment, your uniform, and how you make offers, impact the negotiation.

When you factor in the variables mentioned above, and there are more that could be considered, you can quickly understand why there’s no ‘one size fits all’ when it comes to a ‘best way to win negotiations’.

For now, let’s focus on the factors mentioned.

 

  1. Before the Negotiation:

Before entering into the negotiation, gather as much background information on the other negotiator as possible. That information should include the demeanor he adopts when he feels cornered, the tells he displays when confused/stressed/lying, and how he reacts when he’s overconfident. Having such information will allow you to create a more precise plan from which to negotiate.

 

  1. The Environment:

The environment you negotiate in can have a profound impact on the negotiation. If the environment feels hostile (i.e. dark, drab, dink, scary) or threatening in any manner, you or the other negotiator may make concessions just to escape the environment. That’s in a drastic case but there are also less situational esthetics that can weigh on your mental aptitude when negotiating. Thus, you should always take care to choose environments that work best per the negotiation persona you wish to project.

It has often been misconstrued to think, the negotiator that has the negotiation in her environment has an advantage. Again, that depends on how she uses that environment to advantage her position and to your disadvantage.

 

  1. Your Uniform:

In this case, your uniform is the way you’re dressed; your accessories and the way you carry yourself should match the negotiation environment.

Two negotiators, one impeccably dressed in a Brooks Brothers suit and the other in blue jeans and a plaid shirt are in mismatched uniforms. They’re communicating through their attire that they don’t ‘see things the same way’. If one is intentionally attempting to send such a message and he’s aware of how that positions him that can be a good ploy to employ. If he’s not aware, his level of awareness should be raised per the impact his attire is having on the negotiation.

 

  1. Your Offers:

The way you present offers (i.e. confidently, shyly, bold, weak) impacts how the offer is perceived.

I remember asking someone how much they could provide a service that I was seeking. The person said, “Uh, how’s about $10,000?” The way he said it really did sound like a question. The way he delivered his pronouncement indicated that he wasn’t sure of the offer, which did not instill in me the thought that he might be able to address my request satisfactorily. Plus, you should always be mindful of how you use numbers in a negotiation. Big round numbers (e.g. $10,000) can give the impression that you didn’t put a lot of thought into the number, whereas non-round numbers can convey more preciseness (e.g. $9,947). Just be prepared to defend how you arrived at that number and be careful not to disclose too much about that process.

 

As you can see, there is a myriad of variables that make-up a winning negotiation. When you master the key variables, you’ll have more winning negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com   or at (609) 369-2100.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Rebound Right From A Dreadful Negotiation” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Dread only last as long as you sense it’s there. When negotiating, get over your dread and your dread will be dead.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

How To Rebound Right From A Dreadful Negotiation

 

Everyone has a dreadful negotiation at some point in their life. Good negotiators know how to rebound right from dreadful negotiations, which makes them better negotiators in the long run.

 

Consider the following mental agilities when you’ve been confronted by a dreadful negotiation. They’ll quicken your pace to the road of success.

 

  1. Assess what happened compared to what you expected to occur. In your assessment, consider the thought process that went into the plan you developed for the negotiation, what components you overlooked and why you did so, and lend special attention to how you’ll prevent the dreadful outcome you experienced from occurring again. Everyone has bad negotiation days and one negotiation outcome does not a negotiation career make.

 

  1. Get through the following psychological stages as rapidly as you can. Doing so will be mentally uplifting, which will keep you away from the mental dragons that might attempt to slay you and your thoughts about your negotiation abilities.

 

  • Grief/Denial: I don’t believe this happened to me; that may be the first prominent thought that attempts to plague you. Cast it aside. In order to move past your grief/denial stage, you must accept the reality of the situation for what it is. At that point, you may be able to seriously consider alternatives to either reopen the negotiation and/or to reposition the understanding you had about its outcome. Doing so will also accelerate the acceptance phase of this process.

 

  • Anger: You may be justified in being upset about the outcome of the negotiation, but don’t let that rob you of your mental thought process. Also, don’t be overly angry about what the other negotiator did during the negotiation or to you. Again, the sooner you can obtain a clear mind the sooner you’ll be able to think coherently. Plus, the other negotiator was doing the exact same thing that you were attempting to do, maximize the best possible outcome for her side. Remember, people will only do to you what you allow them to do.

 

  • Acceptance: Once you’ve embraced the outcome for the reality that it is, you can begin to grapple with it. At that point, you can formulate a plan of action to address the outcome of the negotiation. You’ll also be in a better frame of mind to seek insights from a negotiation advisor that may be able to offer solutions that you’d not considered.

 

  1. Be happy you experienced the dreadful negotiation outcome you had. Say what! That may sound contrary to what you think you should feel. Let me explain.

 

There were a few aspects that led to the outcome you experienced that you’d not considered. Hopefully, since you survived the outcome, you can learn from the exposure of that experience and allow it to serve as a lesson learned from the school of hard knocks; we tend to remember those lessons more fervently than those that don’t gut-punch us. Learning such hard lessons will also be more prominent about teaching us to avoid them in the future.

 

 

When negotiating, you don’t have to let dreadful negotiation outcomes define your future negotiations. You can rebound better from such letdowns and be better prepared and positioned to engage in future negotiations. Once you wrap your mind around the actions highlighted above you’ll be more mentally prepared for your future negotiations. Setbacks will be viewed as setups for future negotiation wins … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com   or at (609) 369-2100.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Listen Better To Be A Stronger Negotiator” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“When negotiating, the better you listen the more you’ll hear. The more you hear the better you’ll be able to negotiate” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Listen Better To Be A Stronger Negotiator”

 

How well do you listen when negotiating? Do you listen for hidden meanings? Do you listen for silence? To be a stronger negotiator, you have to listen better, because even silence can speak volumes about the thoughts the other negotiator is contemplating.

The following are a few things you can do to be a stronger negotiator simply by listening better.

 

What to listen for:

 

  • Word choices: When negotiating, you should always be observant of the word choices that are used by the other negotiator. The words she uses represents her subliminal associations to those words. Some words, “I think” versus “I’m sure”, “we will” versus “I will”, allow you to gain insight into the degree to which a commitment is being made, along with the degree of authority the person making the pronouncement has to deliver on such pronouncements.

 

  • Change of pace/inflection: When a negotiator alters the pace of his voice, lend pinpointed attention as to why that occurred. You should also note how long the alteration occurs until it recedes back into the pace/inflection that occurred before it was altered. By noting such alterations, you will be better positioned to unmask the causes of those occurrences. In so doing, your attention may be drawn to a matter that requires your immediate attention. To ignore such occurrences could later reveal itself as a missed opportunity or the point at which the negotiation began to head in a disadvantaged position.

 

  • Silence: I’m sure you’ve heard that silence is golden. In a negotiation, it can provide invaluable information and insight. During times of silence, the other negotiator might be in thought-mode, deliberating about what he should do next, how to position/reposition himself, or playing the stall game. Again, note why he went into such a mindset, the moment it occurred via what was being discussed, and attempt to discern what he might be contemplating (i.e. additional insights can be obtained by observing his body language (refer to the book, “Body Language Secrets To Win More Negotiations”)). Once he begins to re-engage, note how he does so. If he appears to be more animated than before that could be an indication that he sees a greater opportunity in the negotiation for himself. A more subdued endowment might indicate the opposite mindset. To determine which is more accurate use probing questions to uncover his thoughts (e.g. what just happened? I noticed a marked change in your demeanor and attitude.)

 

  • Intuition: Everyone has sensations about the things occurring in their environment as they go throughout their day. In most cases, we don’t pay attention to most of them because our brain would be bombarded and go into information overload; we’d never get a lot done if we stopped and analyzed the meaning of every sensation we experienced.

 

To the degree you have a strong sensation during your negotiations, strong enough for you to sense that you felt something, pay attention to it. Your subconscious mind could be attempting to draw your attention to something that’s very pertinent to what’s being discussed.

 

There is a myriad of things occurring during a negotiation. To better identify the meaning of those that are most important, make an effort to listen better during your negotiations. You’ll be rewarded with better negotiation outcomes … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com   or at (609) 369-2100.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator

 

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Is Negotiating More Like a Fool Really Foolish” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Foolishness is open to perception. Thus, if acting like a fool achieves your goals over another, is the fool the one that doesn’t act foolishly?” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Is Negotiating More Like a Fool Really Foolish”

 

When negotiating, do you sometimes act foolishly? If so, are you embarrassed when that occurs?

Smart negotiators know they must employ sneaky ploys at times. Such includes acting foolishly if a situation is warranted.

 

The following are several scenarios in which you might invoke foolishness.

 

  1. Altering or changing the dynamics of the negotiation:

In any negotiation, you must be mindful of how any strategy you employ will play out. That means, you should have backups of your strategies (e.g. I’m not sure why I said/did that! Let’s get back on track (used when you did not get the response from the other negotiator that you sought). At a minimum, at that point, you’ve infused the negotiation with something for the opposing negotiator to think about. Thus, the ploy could have been implemented to alter his demeanor. If that was the case and his perspective was altered per the goal you sought to achieve, your ploy was successful.

 

  1. Altering the perspective of the other negotiator:

Have you ever talked to yourself? Everyone has done so at some point in time. A better question is, do you answer the questions you pose to yourself? It may sound silly, silly is as silly does, but you can openly talk to yourself during a negotiation by posing hypothetical questions out loud to discern the reaction you get from the other negotiator.

I did this once in a negotiation and after a while, the other negotiator started addressing my hypothetical questions. That gave me insight into two facts. One, I was leading him (When you lead someone in a negotiation, they acquiesce to your suggestions). Two, he was giving me insight as to how he would respond if the questions weren’t hypothetical.

 

  1. Acting the Clown:

I recall one negotiation I was in that had become very dire. Neither I nor the other negotiator wanted to make additional concessions because both of us thought that would give way to the other negotiator gaining the upper hand. At one point, I stated, somewhat loud, let’s get silly! With that, I bent under the table and put on a red clown nose. When I reappeared, the other negotiator burst out laughing. After that, we reengaged in the negotiation with him saying, “If you’re not afraid of being silly, you can’t be that bad.” Whenever that gentleman and I see one another, we still laugh about that time.

What can you do to break the monotony when you reach impasses in your negotiations? Seriously, it’s something you should consider before entering into a negotiation. By considering such, you can be prepared with the props needed/required to alter the pace of the negotiation and the mindset of the other negotiator. After all, people that are perceived as having a sense of humor are also perceived to be more human, more down to earth.

 

When engaged in a negotiation, especially one that may be fraught with tension and anxiety, consider how you can alter the negotiation to alter the environment. Acting foolish is one way that you can do it. If used at the right time, you’ll change the dynamics of the negotiation which could lead to a more successful negotiation outcome … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite

 

 

 

Continue...

Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“You’ll Absolutely Worry If you Miss Your Negotiation Train” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Change is constant. When negotiating don’t assume things are the way they’ve always been.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“You’ll Absolutely Worry If you Miss Your Negotiation Train”

 

There I stood at the entrance to track two waiting for the 7:32 train to arrive for New York. At 7:30, I heard the whistle of the train and I thought thank goodness it’s on time; I had a very important meeting in New York and I didn’t want to be late.

The train pulled in and as I later found out, it was on track one. Track one was on the other side of the station, which is not where I’d always caught the train in the past. I looked at the train that, from my perspective was on the wrong track and at the wrong side of the station. I wondered what the heck was going on. It was 7:31 and even though the train had New York as its destination moniker, I was puzzled and went into process-thinking mode. Meanwhile, I heard another train’s whistle and saw that train was speeding towards me on track one. As it sped by me, not stopping, I felt confused. I couldn’t move. Needless to say, I missed the 7:32 train because I was not quick enough with my thoughts to take advantage of what was right in front of me.

I was filled with consternation after that, but I was reminded that I should not assume things are the same from one day to the next. You should remember that when you’re negotiating.

 

Be Aware Of Assumptions:

I’d initiated my train ride on many occasions in the past from that train station. I assumed everything that had always been true (i.e. the track the train would be on, tracks numbered in order) would be the same; the tracks were numbered two, one, three (go figure). What I didn’t consider was, that was the first time I’d caught the train that early in the morning. I should not have assumed that things would be the same as they were later in the day.

When you’re negotiating, be careful of the assumptions you make. The wrong assumptions can lead you to missing your negotiation train (i.e. opportunities).

 

Your New Normal Occurs Every day:

That means, what you knew yesterday will influence what you think you know about today. Given that, you should assess how the thoughts you had yesterday are influencing the decisions you make today. When negotiating always update your thought process with the most up to date information.

 

Trust Your Intuition:

When negotiating, you’ll have sensory perceptions. Don’t ignore them. In most cases what you’re sensing is something you pick up at a subliminal, subconscious level. Your perception is not fully registering your state of full consciousness. Since you’re bombarded with sensory information constantly, your brain doesn’t send every piece of data to your consciousness. You’d experience data overload if that occurred and that would tremendously hamper your decision-making abilities.

If you’re in a critical stage of a negotiation, be prepared to move with haste if you sense something needs immediate action. Having said that, make sure that you don’t move so quickly that haste turns into a disadvantaged action.

 

When negotiating, be prepared with rebuttals you’ll offer during the negotiations. Also be mindful that there will be unexpected occurrences that you’d not anticipated. When that happens, take special note of what you’re sensing, why you may be having such sensations, and the meaning that’s coming from them. It’s an attempt by your subconscious mind to grab the attention of your conscious state of mind. If the sensation is strong enough, there’s hidden value in paying attention to it. Once you become more attuned to such sensations, you’ll begin to win more negotiations … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Expert Advice On How To Negotiate With A Bully” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“To be fearless against a bully display what he fears.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Expert Advice On How To Negotiate With A Bully”

 

Follow this expert advice to negotiate with a bully.

 

  1. Differentiate between a bully that may be controlling versus bullying. Some people don’t see themselves as bullies. They may be the type that likes to be in control of situations and display overly aggressive means to maintain that control. The two perspectives possess different mindsets.

 

  1. Identify the personality type of the bully you’re negotiating with (you’re always negotiating). Thus, even in your first encounter with a person (and after that time), you should assess that person’s traits, demeanor, and characteristics. Doing so will give you the insight needed to formulate a negotiation strategy.

 

  1. Determine the best environment to negotiate with a bully. He may be stronger in one environment as the result of resources surrounding him or those he has to ‘save face’ for; this may also tend to make him cockier than he’d normally be. If that’s the case, get him out of his environment; this should be done physically and/or psychologically. In doing so you’ll dilute his psychological powers and weaken him mentally in the process (i.e. power is perceptional).

 

  1. If addressing a bully on a one-on-one basis doesn’t achieve your objective(s), marshal forces to use as leverage against him. Depending on the situation, let those that he has more respect for take the lead on your behalf; never let a bully know how strong your forces are. You must be prepared to send in a second, third, fourth, etc., wave that’s stronger than what preceded it. For maximum effect, the timing of your next foray should occur just when the bully thinks he’s squashed your best efforts. In normal situations, over time you’ll wear the bully down and he’ll acquiesce to your wishes. Be mindful of the bully that won’t acquiesce over a period of exhaustive negotiations when forces have been marshaled against him. You might be dealing with a bully that’s willing to destroy himself for the sake of denying you any kind of victory. To prevent from making too many concessions, establish exit points that indicate when you should depart the negotiation. Always be mindful that, the longer you stay engaged in a negotiation, the likelier you are to make concessions to your disadvantage. This is due to the psychological need to see the negotiation to its end. This could be to your severe detriment.

 

  1. Once you’ve achieved your objective(s), over a period of time reengage the bully from a polite perspective and observe how he interacts with you. To the degree the relationship is important to you, be prepared to let him win an encounter, but never let him bully you again. Your prior actions should be engrained in his mind to the point that he’d not want to experience the prior encounter that you two engaged in.

 

  1. As further insight into the affects your engagement has had with a bully, note how those closes to the bully engage with you after an encounter. Their actions will allow you to assess the degree of sting that still resides in the bully.

 

Bullies only pick on those that they perceive to be weaker than themselves. Don’t let a bully perceive weakness in you and he’ll have no target to attack … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating.

 

#HowToNegotiateBetter #HowToNegotiateWithBully #PreventBullying

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Uncategorized, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,