“If you fear losing what you’ve gained, you’ve already lost it.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
“Are You Afraid Of Losing To Progress?”
When you think of progress, do you become afraid? Do you even consider what progress is and what it means to you? Progress will occur whether you’re afraid of it, don’t consider it, or choose to let it pass you by. It’s the one thing that’s constant in life. So, if you want to evolve in the ever-evolving environment that you’re in, you can do that by considering the following.
Define what progress means to you and why it has that meaning; you should realize that your definition will change over time. Recognize when those changes occur and what brought them about. Then, use markers to identify and measure how close you are to a goal. Make readjustments when they’re required. If you become apprehensive about making them or you do nothing to address them, consider whether you’re afraid of losing to progress. You may have a mental barrier that’s holding you back.
Ask yourself, when did you most aggressively seek progress? Why did you seek it? Other questions to ask are:
What changed in your life to cause you to seek progress?
How did you feel while you were going through what promoted the need for change, for progress?
What has change done for you?
What do you fear the most about progress? Is it change itself that causes angst? Other questions to ask are:
Are you fearful of leaving those you’ve known behind?
Are you concerned about where progress might lead you?
Will you regret not following the path of progress later in your life? If so, what does that thought do to you? How do you feel about it?
What has frustrated you the most about progress?
When you won’t move forward to embrace a goal, especially if it’s one that’s important to you, something’s holding you back. If you explore all realms of possibilities and you still can’t identify the silent hand that’s gripping you, you might be afraid of losing to progress. To test the theory, ask yourself the questions above. You’ll find answers to your dilemma in those questions. When all else fails let that be the last thought that you tackle. If fear is the culprit and you successfully combat it, you’ll slay that gobbling … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
Fear prevents some negotiators from being more aggressive. Because of that, they’ll lack the drive to obtain more in a negotiation. While you should exercise caution in a negotiation, caution based on fear can be self-demeaning.
If you fear progress, due to the gains you’ve acquired in a negotiation, assess the mindset that’s motivating you. There are times when leaving too much on the negotiation table is just as bad as attempting to gain too much. In either case, you can appear to be inept. When you display that type of demeanor it can be the setup that signals the other negotiator to be more aggressive with you. That could also be what signals him to push you harder by seeking more concessions. And, that’s a position you don’t want to be in.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!
After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
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