Negotiation, Communication and
Body Language Strategies

“Your Mind Has Been Primed” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

“Like priming for paint, future actions are primed by the past.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

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“Your Mind Has Been Primed”

 

Consider this – for the next 20 seconds, think about a time when you were most happy in your life. Please, do it!

Okay, did you do it? Did you think about a time when you were most happy in your life? If you did, now I’d like you to think about someone that you had a recent dispute with, someone that angered you. Is the image of that occasion duller than it was prior to thinking of a happier time? If it wasn’t, you need to learn how to let go of things that cause you angst. You’re only hurting yourself by hanging on to hurtful thoughts. If the memory of the spat you had with someone recently subsided, even if it’s just a smidgen, you were primed by the happy thought you engaged in before recalling that negative situation.

So, what does this mean? It means, when you have pleasant thoughts about past occurrences, the thoughts that follow do not appear to be as harsh. Of course, with the passage of time, your mind will gravitate back to what’s normal for it, related to how you view things that occur in your life. But, that also means that you can control how you view such occurrences. Thus, if you choose to prime your mind with thoughts of happier times, you can choose how you react to everything that occurs to you.

Priming your mind is the door through which you can choose to move in a more positive direction in life. It can also be used to highlight the negative aspects of your life, if you choose not to be positive. The point is, the choice is always yours.

I don’t wish to oversimplify this concept, but it really is simple. You have the power to choose how you feel and how you’ll react to everything that happens to you. Realize that power, control that power, use that power in a positive manner … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

In a negotiation, your mind is primed by what has occurred in prior negotiations that you’ve been a party to. Realize that as a fact and be mindful of the prejudices you possess going into the negotiation. Plus, if you wish the other negotiator to be in a more pleasant state of mind, prime him with positive thoughts about his past before entering into parts of the negotiation that might be fraught with potential peril.

Engaging in a negotiation with the thought of how you’ll prime yourself, and the other negotiator, will give you greater insight into how you can sidestep potential pitfalls. It will also allow you to be quicker in the avoidance of those pitfalls.

Quick, think about a lucky leprechaun. Did you see a little person in green? Now, think of a number between 1 and 10. Did you think of the number 7? If you did, you displayed to yourself the effects of priming. Most people associate a leprechaun with good luck and someone attired in green. If you didn’t think of a little person in green or the number 7, that’s okay. You think differently than most people. Be aware of that.

Priming works – use it and it will work for you in your negotiations.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free  “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#NegotiatingWithABully #Priming #mindpriming #emotionalcontrol #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #ControlLife #Control #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Achievement

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“In Negotiations With A Bully Watch Your Hidden Thoughts” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“A hidden thought can lead your thinking into a dead-end. Avoid dead-end thinking. Be alert when engaging your mind in its thought process.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

 “In Negotiations With A Bully Watch Your Hidden Thoughts”

 

 

In negotiations with a bully, you have to watch your hidden thoughts, or those thoughts will have you thinking wrong.

“You have to beat them like they’ve done something really bad. Whip them until their insides are mashed. Can you do that? Will you do that?”

 

After reading the above, what are your initial thoughts? What images came to mind? Were they the images of a tough guy giving an edict to his underlings, that they dare not disobey? Or, did you consider that something other then the questions posed was occurring?

The thoughts you had about the opening statements, and the images that came to your mind, where determined by what you’ve experienced in life and the outcomes of those experiences. That means, to a degree, your thoughts began to formulate as soon as you read the first few words of the statement. Then, your mind jumped ahead of what you were reading to assume where the unread words would take you. That’s good, and it’s dangerous. The good part stems from the way you assimilate information. The bad part stems from not monitoring your expectations before jumping to judgment.

The words at the opening of this article were spoken by a chef to one of the cooks in an establishment that both were employed. The chef was referring to the correct way to make an omelet. Thus, he was talking about beating and whipping eggs to obtain a certain degree of consistency to make omelets more palatable.

When negotiating with a bully, you must be more cognizant of the way you think. Your thought process will be altered, in the prefrontal cortex area of your brain, the brain region in which complex behavior – decision making – and the moderation of social behavior occurs. This part of your brain will become more active due to the bully’s demeanor. You may experience a higher degree of emotions stemming from the perception of a threat, be it implicit or explicit. Such an emotional state may cause you to disengage from your normal thought process, which could lead you into that dead-end mentioned at the top of this article.

To combat your hidden thoughts, take into consideration what the bully is saying versus what he’s doing. If there’s a disconnect between his words and his actions, pay more attention to his actions (e.g. he says he’s going to run you into the ground in this negotiation while backing away from you and/or smiling nervously). Having this insight and using it to calculate your next action will allow you to think more clearly. That will also allow you to uncover any hidden thoughts that might create a sense of being overly fearful of a negative occurrence being projected on to you.

Negotiating with a bully is always a challenging proposition, but that proposition can be lessened by thinking about the way you think. Heighten your sense of awareness when negotiating with a bully, by being aware of where your thought processes are leading your thoughts … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#negotiatingwithabully #bully #bullies #bullying #uncoversecrets #hiddensecrets #Negotiation #Personal Development #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“The Value of Relationships – Long Versus Short” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

Life’s value-add is perceptional. Manage your expectations to better assess the sources from which value can be attracted to your life.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“The Value of Relationships – Long Versus Short”

 

Are the relationships you’re in adding or subtracting value from your life? It’s a serious question to ponder and one to reassess daily.

Too many times we wake up one morning and realize that we’re no longer living the ideal life we seek. Depending on the severity of that realization, we go into a state of panic, brought on by thoughts of uneasiness. You know when things aren’t right in your life! It’s usually a terse feeling that emanates from your gut that delivers the message. Then, you may appear to be erratic to those who know you, which may cause them to reevaluate the value you’re bringing to their life. That can set off a vicious cycle fraught with angst and anxiety. The question then becomes, what’s a person to do to maintain some sense of equilibrium in their life? The answer lies in the relationships you have with others.

If you find yourself in toxic relationships, at work, at home, etc., change them! Seek to alter the dynamics of the relationships that drag you down emotionally and/or physically. It may be difficult to do but consider the cost of your sanity, your wellbeing. Weigh the cost of that against the difficulty that change might require.

When engaging with people, consider the value you add to their life and they to yours. Some people will be with you for life (long-term) others for a season (short-term). Accept this mentally, understand it and don’t allow it to become a conundrum when it’s time to move on. Don’t get wrapped up thinking that you have to stay with people due to the time you’ve known them; such thoughts will make you sentimental, which will jade your emotions and thought process about moving on. There are others that want to add value to your life, but you won’t find them holding on to those that don’t.

When you know you’re in short-term environments, treat those in it as though they may become long-term associates. Doing so may turn them into long-term allies, but don’t become fixated on the thought that they’ll be with you through thick and thin. Having such a mindset will allow moving on to be less jerky. If someone stays in your life longer than what had been anticipated, because they were adding value, be thankful. You’ve been blessed … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

With some people, a negotiation may be transactional, not intended to be of long-term value. That’s okay. Knowing the parameters of this type of relationship allows you to be better positioned to engage in the negotiation. After all, when you negotiate, you never know who will truly fit into a long-term relationship until you examine their values. Evaluate such closely and from different perspectives. What you eventually find may not be what you initially saw, and what you initially saw may be something that you initially didn’t expect.

The point is, keep your emotions grounded in all of your relationships. Accept people for the value they add to your life, and the value you add to theirs.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#NegotiatingWithABully #relationships #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #ControlLife #Control #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Achievement

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Watch Emotional Abuse When Negotiating With A Bully” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“Emotional abuse only occurs when you allow the abuser to control you. To defeat him, control his abusive efforts.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Watch Emotional Abuse When Negotiating With A Bully”

 

When negotiating with a bully, watch the emotional abuse you incur and mind your responses to it.

Bullies make some people experience an array of feelings in a negotiation. They do so for the pleasure of feeling superior to the other negotiator in an effort to exert their dominance. The emotional feelings they attempt to invoke can range from fear to hate to happiness. Yes, bullies can make you feel happy as the result of relinquishing the pressure they’ve applied to you. That’s another reason why you should monitor your emotions. You want to check them so you can display the proper response, based on your position in the negotiation at particular points. When it comes to watching your emotions take note of the following.

 

Fear:

Fear can invoke primal actions within you. When fearful, your normal thought process shuts down. Depending on the degree of fear you experience, your body prepares for a fight, flight, or freeze scenario. That deliberation can cause you to be thrown off your negotiation game (i.e. forget the negotiation strategies you’d planned to implement).

When you sense that you’re experiencing fear in a negotiation, note its cause. Consider to what degree its source will devastate you and your future position. The point is, diminish your thoughts of fear by contemplating how you can assuage it before continuing the negotiation, and recognize when it has you in its grips.

 

Anger:

Anger is another stealer of normal thoughts. It can be stoked by fear, which is also the reason you should control your perspective of fear and ager.

When angered, you can lose your perspective and rationalization. Thus, to negotiate from a mindset of anger will not serve you, it serves the other negotiator, instead.

Therefore, be aware of when the other negotiator is intentionally attempting to gouge you by instilling fear into the negotiation. Also, be mindful of what his attempts might look like before entering the negotiation. This can be accomplished by role-playing ahead of time. Just be mindful of elucidating your mind to how fear might be used against you, and be prepared to thwart such efforts.

 

Happiness:

Most people seek happiness as a constant state of mind. Our body seeks it too. Thus, when we’re not in a state of happiness, our mind will attempt to guide our actions back towards that state. It will also do ‘things’ to stay in that state, even if those ‘things’ are to our future detriment. It’s because of the latter that you should be hyper-vigilant when you’re in a state of happiness that’s been caused by a bully’s actions. You may not be off the hook. Instead, you may have been unknowingly placed deeper onto one.

To combat a bully’s effort to mentally manipulate you through the use of happiness, understand his motives for doing so. If his efforts don’t serve you, don’t appease him by succumbing to this tactic. Remain stern.

 

Anyone’s emotions can be strained when negotiating with a bully. Suffice it to say, you should stay on top of your emotions when negotiating with a bully more so than with other types of negotiators. Bullies can invoke extreme passion within you, which is why it’s so important to be mindful. If you’re aware of what can ‘set you off’, and not allow it to cloud your actions or judgment under such circumstances, you’ll be able to think clearer and negotiate better. That alone will give the bully cause for doubt, which means you’ll be turning his tactics against him. Doing so will allow you to maintain greater control in the negotiation … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#bully #bullies #bullying #uncoversecrets #hiddensecrets #Negotiation #Personal Development #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“How To Uncover Hidden Secrets In Negotiations” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“Secrets are cloaked in darkness until they’re exposed by light. When suspension falls on hidden secrets, let the light shine brightly.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“How To Uncover Hidden Secrets In Negotiations”

 

“Don’t let what you know cause you to miss what you don’t know!” Those were the words of one negotiation partner to another, after they’d concluded a negotiation that appeared to be clouded by the doubt that there may have been hidden secrets burrowed in the words of their negotiation counterpart.

Upon reflection, the speaker of those words realized that there had been signals that he’d misperceived. He wondered about those signals as he pondered to what degree they might have covered hidden secrets.

In your negotiations, how much do you miss, due to what you think you already know? There are encoded messages within the words we use to communicate. Some contain hidden messages that carry hidden thoughts.

Note the following to gain more insight into the hidden secrets in the messages sent and received in your negotiations.

 

  1. Take note when the real meaning of a word doesn’t carry the intent of the meaning you think it’s attempting to convey. That’s to say, note when you suspect that there may be an unspoken meaning of the word(s). You’ll experience a sensation of intuition when that occurs; take heed of this phenomenon when it happens. It will be your alert signal beckoning your attention.
  • They’ll be times when you sense there’s an implied meaning that’s not conveyed in the delivery of the words spoken. When you have such a sensation, be attentive to what you sensed that drew your attention to the feeling of suspect that you have. Uncovering that hidden meaning will allow you to uncover hidden secrets that the other negotiator may be attempting to conceal.

 

  1. When people speak of themselves in the third person, become more attentive. They’re distancing themselves from their words.
  • When negotiating, you should always be attentive to everything that’s occurring in your environment. When it comes to someone speaking in the third person, you should become more attentive. Psychologically, he’s placing distance between himself and his words. He may be doing so due to his nervousness, his desire to protect something that you’ve gotten close to uncovering, or from sensing that he may have disclosed something about his statement that’s untrue. Regardless, his action was more than likely brought on by some action the two of you were engaged in. If you sense such is the case, pursue the line of interaction that put him in his third person state of mind. There’ll be something of interest there that may benefit you in the negotiation.

 

  1. Compare your assumptions of what you thought would occur prior to the negotiation, to what actually occurred in the negotiation.
  • Engaging in a mental reflection process at the conclusion of a negotiation will allow you greater insights, per the way you were thinking prior to the negotiation. Your post insights will allow you to sharpen your perception about the perspective occurrences of future negotiations. That, in turn, will allow you to uncover hidden thoughts about the way you think. Knowing that, should allow you to become more circumspective as you engage in future negotiation.

 

There will always be some form of secrecy in any negotiation. If you possess a heightened sense of awareness when perceiving suspected hidden meanings, your reward will be in the uncovering of those secrets. That will be an insight that you can use to benefit your negotiation position … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#uncoversecrets #hiddensecrets #Negotiation #Personal Development #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Nostalgia – Do You Remember The Good Old Days” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

“No matter how difficult your current times are, one day, they will become the good old days.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Nostalgia – Do You Remember The Good Old Days”

 

He was humbled by the weight of his current circumstances. While reflecting on less challenging times, his smile beamed as he said, “those were the good old days.”

 

No matter the past experiences in your life, you can point to a period that brings fond memories to your mind. You probably consider such memories as, the good old days. Visiting those remembrances conjures images of times gone by. They warm your heart.

When you’re engaged with someone and the conversation heads in an unwanted direction from what you’re striving to achieve, seek to put that person in a state of nostalgia. You have to know what will stimulate them to possess such a state. What follows is how you can achieve that.

If the pace of speech has become somewhat accelerated, slow it down. Slowing down the pace of speech, from one that was previously accelerated, will serve to slow the pace of communications down. Studies suggest that this will cause the person with whom your speaking to think at a slower, more reflective pace. You’ll know to what degree you’ve achieved this state by an unfocused appearance in the eyes of the person you’re speaking to. Once you’ve succeeded at that, talk about the times they were happiest in their life. That will put them into something akin to a trance. From there, as long as they stay in that state, you’ll be able to bond and move them in the direction you wish them to go. That’s to say, as long as they perceive such direction as being beneficial to their wellbeing … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

In a negotiation, altering the pace of speech is one way to alter and control the trajectory of the negotiation; invoking fond memories that the other negotiator experienced in the past is another.

Negotiators can get caught up in the moment. Their mind can become bombarded by thoughts of strategies and maneuvers they’ll implement. In such environments, things can become very tense. To diffuse the environment, go nostalgic. Do so by invoking fond memories that occurred in her past. If accomplished successfully, the level of tension will decrease, along with the level of resistance that previously existed in the negotiation. Prior to invoking this state, you should have prepared for the actions you’d engage in going forward. Now would be the time to implement such actions. Tie her current state of emotion to the outcome sought for the negotiation. That will be a powerful ploy!

You’ve more than likely heard that all is fair in love and war. The same is true when negotiating. Thus, when you’re in a tumultuous negotiation, try this tact and observe what occurs. You might be surprised by the reward of a better than expected outcome.

 

#Nostalgia #GoodOldDays #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #ControlLife #Control #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Achievement

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Negotiation – Don’t Fall Prey To The First Enemy Of Uncertainty” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

“When it comes to uncertainty, it’s okay to pray about the direction to take. Just be sure not to fall prey to the uncertainty of that direction. Know when to follow and know when to lead.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Negotiation – Don’t Fall Prey To The First Enemy Of Uncertainty”

 

As he walked past an unseen man lying on the ground, he heard someone exclaim, “he looks like he’s dying!” He thought to himself, “I’m uncertain of what to do. Others seem to be handling this. I’m not going to get involved.” He later discovered that unseen man was his father.

 

Are you aware of when you fall prey to the first enemy of uncertainty in a negotiation (You’re always negotiating)? Do you know what that is? The first enemy of uncertainty in a negotiation is the emotions, actions, and reactions you engage in, based on what those around you are doing or do. The opening statement highlights that point. The first enemy of uncertainty is doubt.

When you’re in an environment and you’re not sure of what to do, you seek direction from others in the environment; you may do this in a quiet mindset to assuage your mind of the lack of direction it’s offering you. Your uncertainty is the driver that’s not sure of where to go, so you seek the opinions and insights of others to direct you. Thus, by observing their actions or reactions, you gain a sense of what you might do.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with following the lead of the other negotiator; you can obtain great insights from doing so. The challenge lies in when you should lead from the front, lead from behind, or allow him to lead. If you’re in a leadership position up to that point, relinquishing the lead may seem or feel tenuous. You may even feel that your lack of direction is splayed for all to see, which might call your perceived leadership into question. If such is the case, realize that uncertainty has crept into your mind. The way you deal with it will determine the direction you take in the negotiation.  Don’t be mentally constrained by such a thought. Here are a few things to be aware of.

 

  1. You’re more likely to be influenced into some form of action based on where you see yourself in relation to the other negotiator (i.e. superior, in a controlling position, inferior, etc.)

 

  1. Based on what’s occurred prior to the point of uncertainty, you may be more or less circumspective. Be aware of this because it too will impact your perception and the actions you engage in.

 

  1. While you’re in a stage of mental siege, take note of what the other negotiator is doing. In particular, note the degree that he studies your actions. If he cues off of your actions, he may be wondering about your position or to what degree you’re contemplating his. If you sense the latter, don’t relieve him of his quandary. You can use that time to think about your next move.

 

Here’s the point. When you’re in a negotiation, at the first sign of uncertainty, stop and think. Don’t be mentally belabored by the perception of pending doom, or the fear of looking stupid. When it comes to uncertainty, we seek the leadership of others to lead us, or we can call upon our prior actions for that purpose. To combat uncertainty, know which source to choose.

When you heighten your sense of awareness about uncertainty, you’ll have greater insight into how to control it. Controlling it will be the key that unlocks the blockade where uncertainty lurks. That will allow you to banish the enemy of uncertainty, which is doubt … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Enemy #Uncertainty #Negotiation #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #CombatDisinformation

 

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“The Danger In The ‘Us Versus Them’ Dilemma” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

“When it comes to an ‘us versus them’ mentality, potential danger looms in the inability to understand ‘them’.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

 

“The Danger In The ‘Us Versus Them’ Dilemma”

 

“If we stick together, we can overcome them.” Those were the words of a devoted follower of his group. That is, he was a follower until he realized that he did not want to follow the group in the direction it was going.

 

There’s danger in the ‘us versus them’ mindset; it’s a dilemma people don’t realize when they’re in it. So, what is that danger and why should you be mindful of its pitfalls?

Psychologically, everyone needs to belong to an entity that’s larger than themselves. That’s not the dangerous part of the dilemma; the danger lies in the degree that you’re willing to follow the group, based on your own beliefs, and the confliction that might be caused as the result of those two being out of sync with one another. It also highlights what can occur, per how you view what the group terms as enemies of its norms. You hear that in the intonation of, “they’re not like us.” Therefore, something must be wrong with them.

If one adopts the latter mindset, their mind becomes clouded by the prominent thought that someone that doesn’t share the same norms as the group that they belong to, must be ‘missing the boat’ (i.e. not seeing something right). Once such a mindset is adopted, you’ll seek confirmation in the actions of those that are unlike your group, to confirm why you can’t treat them like you treat members of your group. In essence, your mind will have been jaded to receiving positive thoughts and ideas that might otherwise allow you to see ‘the others’ in a positive light.

If you want to be more open-minded, do so by believing, and allowing your thoughts to be moved by, the thinking that people may have different opinions and perspectives about something, but because they do, that doesn’t make them wrong or a bad person.

When it comes to ‘us versus them’, keep an open mind with the intent to discover something new about the perspective being discussed. Doing so will allow you to gain more insight into anything that you weigh. That will make you a more informed individual … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

In a negotiation, you should always be mindful as to how you’re being influenced by the biases you have, towards the person making the proposal or offer. Even if you don’t like the initial offer, don’t let your initial emotions alter its appearance. There may be more than meets the eye, if you keep an open mind and consider any hidden benefits the offer might contain.

Good negotiators are aware that they can control a negotiation better, by controlling themselves. When it comes to, ‘us versus them’ in a negotiation, such a demeanor will only serve as a blight on an otherwise more successful negotiation outcome.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

What are your thoughts? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Danger #Dilemma #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #ControlLife #Control #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Achievement

 

 

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Uncategorized, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Negotiation – How Do You Know When To Trust The Truth” – Negotiation Tip of the Week

Negotiation Tip of the Week

 

“The truth is the opposite of a lie that’s believable. Watch what you believe!” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Negotiation – How Do You Know When To Trust The Truth”

 

“You don’t know what the truth looks like, even though I’ve recited it numerous times to you through my ever-changing story.”

What does the truth feel like, sound like, look like, when you feel it, hear it, see it? How do you determine to what degree the truth has been told? The truth can be fluid. That means, we know what the truth is today, based on what we’ve known to be truthful in the past. Then, as greater insight, discoveries, and other machinations are introduced into our environment, a new truth can emerge.

It’s important to understand how you discern what you perceive to be the truth because others can manipulate you, based on what they know of your ability to distinguish between fact from fiction.

To become more cognizant as to when someone might be engaging in the truth, versus having no relationship with it at all, take note of the following insights.

 

Demeanor – Yours and Theirs

Always note the demeanor of someone when they engage with you. In particular, note to what degree they feel at ease, uptight, or normal (whatever that is as it relates to their demeanor); you can observe this by noting how they act/respond in unstressful environments. The non-stressful environment will become the basis from which to make and compare future assessments. You should also be mindful of how you feel as the result of being with the person that’s speaking to you. Your demeanor will put you into a particular mindset that sets your perception and expectations about that person’s ability to tell the truth.

 

Intuitiveness:

When it comes to truthfulness versus deception, you know more than you think you do. When was the last time you had a ‘feeling’ about whether someone was telling you the truth? What did you experience? Was it something they said, the way they said it, or maybe the way they looked when they said/did it. When you had that sensation, your intuitiveness had kicked in; something triggered it. If you were aware through which senses you perceived such signals, you can use the same sense(s) to heighten your awareness in the future. Never discount a gut feeling. That’s your subconscious mind beckoning your attention.

 

Story In Order:

When people lie, they tend to fill their story with detail and they’ll attempt to tell their story in a chronological order. To catch such a perpetrator, take one aspect of his story and slightly change it as you recite it back to him; don’t let on that you’re doing so to see if he corrects you, or agrees to your version of his story. If he doesn’t correct you, do the same with another section of his story to see what he does. If he lets that one go too, feign forgetfulness and ask him to repeat the story. Note to what degree the story changes from the original version. To the degree that it does, you’ll know where the lie lies.

 

Body Language:

When someone is being truthful, their body language is aligned with their words (i.e. hand and eye movements are synched with words). If you note subtle changes in their demeanor, as they profess to tell you the truth, note the question you posed that caused such a reaction. The question you posed, and their reaction to it, will be a guidepost that indicates the degree that you may be uncovering their lack of truthfulness.

 

There are many reasons why someone may wish to avoid being 100% truthful with you. If you set the ‘right’ environment, observe the storyteller’s body language, and you’re mindful of this person’s demeanor you’ll create the space in which more of the truth can reside … and everything will be right with the world.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#Trust #Truth #Negotiation #HandlingObjections #Negotiator #detectingLies  #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #psychology #CombatDisinformation #HowToHandleObjections

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Body Language and Physiognomics, Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

“Know When You’re Playing A Long Versus Short Game” – Sunday Negotiation Insight

“The less you leave to chance, the less chance will be the source that leads you.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert

 

 

“Know When You’re Playing A Long Versus Short Game”

 

He gently stroked her hand as she was transitioning from this world to someplace more worldly. As he did, he gently whispered to no one in particular, “had I known you were going to be such a pivotal force in my life, I would have treated you differently.”

In your dealings with people, do you play a long or short game (i.e. develop long-term or short-term strategies)?

To a degree, that’s a trick question. Yes, you should have strategies developed based on what you’re attempting to achieve in a relationship, and those strategies will be based on the person that you’re involved with. That means you’ll develop strategies for family members and others that are close to you that are different from those that do not fall into that category.

You may not be aware of the degree that you’re implementing strategies when dealing with people, but nevertheless, you are implementing strategies. Even if it’s just at a subconscious level, you engage with others based on the benefits derived from doing so. If you raise your sense of awareness, related to the short-term gains/opportunities you seek from such engagements, you can gain greater control of yourself and those interactions for the long-term.

When you’re mindful of what you want from a relationship, you become more aware of what you need to do to enhance it. That should trigger the degree of willingness you put forth to engage in actions that promote what’s required for that enhancement.

 

With a heightened sense of awareness, per the value you associate with any relationship, you gain greater control of where the relationship goes. So, no matter where you are in a relationship, reflect on what you want from it, what you’re willing to change about it, and where such changes might lead. In making such assessments, you’ll find paths to longer, more satisfying relationships … and everything will be right with the world.

 

What does this have to do with negotiations?

 

If you’ve followed my articles, you’re aware that my motto is, “you’re always negotiating.” That means, what you do today impacts tomorrow’s outcomes. When it comes to playing a long or short game in a negotiation, your strategies might tend to be more to the point in a short-term undertaking, while the opposite will more likely be the case if the negotiation will be protracted. Thus, one strategy you may adopt in future negotiations, especially if you’re not sure where it might lead in the future, is to treat a short-term engagement as though it was long-term. Doing so may disclose unforeseen benefits.

 

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

 

What are your thoughts? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com

 

To receive Greg’s free 5-minute video on reading body language or to sign up for the “Negotiation Tip of the Week” and the “Sunday Negotiation Insight” click here https://www.themasternegotiator.com/greg-williams/

 

#LongGame #ShortGame #HowToNegotiateBetter #CSuite #TheMasterNegotiator #ControlEmotions #Psychology #Perception #ControlLife #Control #leadership #HowToImproveyourself #Achievement

 

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Posted by Greg Williams in Strategies for Successful Negotiations, Negotiation Tips, Difficult Negotiations & Conflict Resolution, Social Media and Negoiating, Emotional Intelligence, Negotiation Psychology, Sunday Message of Hope and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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