“Success has many suitors. Are you prepared to be embraced by success?” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
“Do You Suffer From The Illusion Of Success?”
Exactly what is a success? You hear people talking about success but seldom do they speak about what it means to be successful. Some people may see what they consider to be a bum laying on a grate and deem him as lacking success. Is that true? Might that individual be so happy with where he is in life that he would consider himself to be successful?
The meaning of success can only be determined by you! And, it’s very important that you define what that means. Its meaning will shift throughout your life but unless you define it at every stage of its change, you’ll miss the opportunity to define its meaning for your future.
When you define what success means to you, you’re defining your future. You’re setting psychological neurons into motion within your own brain to acquire the goals that will determine the degree of success you’ve achieved at some point in the future. That will determine the actions you engage in, the friends you associate with, the job or business activities you indulge in, etc. When you define what success means for you, you set a road map of how you’ll reach the weigh stations along the path to success.
So, don’t create the illusion of success by a lack of its definition. Instead, determine what it’s related to as it relates to the person you wish to be in the future. The better you define what success is to you, the greater the chance you’ll have at creating a plan to become successful. There will be illusions along success’ path but they won’t create the distraction that they would have produced had you not defined its meaning. Plus, you’ll be in a better mental place to banish any illusions that would present themselves as a ghostly harbinger to distract you from your path. That will reduce the angst and stress that you would have placed upon yourself.
Once you acquire the insight to determine what success means for you, you’ll be more mindful of the actions that lead to greater success … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
You should never enter a negotiation without having defined what a successful outcome is. You should also define what a less than stellar outcome will look like. Even if you must exit a negotiation prior to its end, you can still view it as a success. It could be viewed as such when considering the time you might have wasted in an endless loop that was going nowhere.
During your strategy planning stage of your negotiation, highlight what a successful outcome will look like and mean to you. Make sure you assess what you think it will mean and look like for your negotiation counterpart too. With a picture of the meaning of success for both of you, you’ll have a greater understanding of how he’s feeling if it starts to slip from him. That, in turn, will allow you to use the illusion of success to keep him on that path or reward him by giving the presence of success back to him. Regardless of your choice, you’ll be in a stronger negotiation position, and that’s something that every negotiator seeks.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!
After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
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