“To control all aspects of life better, exercise better control of your emotions.” – Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
“Do Your Emotions Confound You”
Are your emotions confounding you? Do you know where those emotions are taking you before you give them control to do so? Your emotions drive your actions and behavior. So, if your emotions are confounding you, you need to understand what’s occurring with them.
In all that you do, you do because you have an emotional force that drives you. Upon reflection, that may be obvious. But, to what degree are you aware of why you do what you do when later you question why you did what you did?
Whether the driving emotional force is in the form of telling someone you love them, showing others by example how to live a righteous life, or being respectful of the wishes and views of other individuals, your emotions are the source of your actions. That’s important to keep in mind because doing so will allow you to identify the source of your actions.
When it comes to the actions you commit be aware that, your emotions drive behavior, your attitudes drive behavior, and your behavior changes your emotions and your attitudes; it’s an unconscious cycle that most folks are oblivious to as they go throughout their day. That lack of introspection is also the cause why some people commit acts for which they later feel regret.
To be in greater control of your life, take greater control of your emotions … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
Negotiations are fraught with emotions that can potentially derail the negotiation. When opposing negotiators are not aware of the emotional impact that their emotions are having on the interpretation of the other negotiator’s actions, that lack of attentiveness can be the source from which doom looms in the negotiation.
When negotiating, not only should you be aware of your own emotional state, you should also be aware of the emotional state of your negotiation counterpart. The more you’re aware of both emotional states, the better you’ll understand why both of you commit certain actions. That will also give you the insight needed to alter the emotional perspectives that are driving the negotiation.
In your very next negotiation, even if it’s with a close friend for something minuscule, note the emotional state that both of you are in when you initiate your exchange and note how that state is altered as you exchange ideas to reach the outcome you seek. That exercise will serve as practice, which will make you a better negotiator in the long run.
What are your takeaways? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
Remember, you’re always negotiating!