Have you ever considered, who controls your mind in a negotiation? That question may not be as mundane as it appears.
In a negotiation, there are subliminal stimuli that motivate you to adopt one action versus another. To the degree you’re cognizant of them, you understand the source of your motivation. To the degree you’re not aware, you could be manipulated into and unenviable negotiation position by the puppeteer called the opposing negotiator.
Before you enter into a negotiation, to a degree, you’ve already won or loss. That’s because, the mindset you have about your negotiation abilities, those of the other negotiator, and the thoughts you possess about the outcome, permeates your mind and actions when you engage in the negotiation. Thus, the mind control you have pertaining to the sense of your abilities, compared to your negotiation counterpart, emanates from you and gets displayed during the negotiation. It’s very much akin to signaling your intentions to yourself before such is projected into your actions. If you’re not infused with a winning mindset, you could be denouncing the potential for victory before it has the opportunity to be born. Your mindset can be enhanced by proper planning for the negotiation (i.e. gathering appropriate information and detailing the strategy you’ll use).
Manipulation can be tough to accurately distinguish. That’s because, what one person views as manipulation can be viewed as being helpful by another. Nevertheless, the interpretation that one assigns to manipulation can determine to what degree they engage or disengage with you throughout the negotiation. Thus, you must understand the meaning and value the other negotiator assigns to the word. If he feels you’re manipulating him to his detriment, he may rail against you for what you perceive to be no valid reason. If the source of his disgruntlement is not understood, it could cause you to become hardened and from there the negotiation could be headed for some form of entrenchment.
The way you view any situation is determined by the perspective you have of it.
In a negotiation some negotiators will do at all cost what it takes to win, some will not. Which type are you negotiating against and which are you? The perspective to do whatever it takes to win can be the fine line between winning and losing. As such, when it comes to the perspective you have, assess what you’ll do to win and assess what you think the other negotiator might do. If you’re not up for the task of doing what’s needed, depending on the outcome you seek, it might behoove you not to enter into the negotiation. Or, know at what point you’ll exact the negotiation, being satisfied with whatever you’ve achieved, even if it’s substantially less than what you wanted. By determining ahead of time the perspective you have and what you’ll do to obtain what you seek, you set barriers in your mind for how deeply you’re willing to go into the abyss to win.
As you can surmise from the above insights, there are many variables that can make or break a negotiation. To the degree you’re attentive to the nuances that occur on a moment to moment basis, you’ll be aware of shifts that occur in the negotiation. By doing so, you’ll keep the negotiation progressing toward the successful outcome you seek … and everything will be right with the world.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!