“Yesterday’s world is the world I was born into; I had no influence in that world. Today’s world is the world I live in; I’m improving myself to understand my world. Tomorrow’s world is the world that I’ll make better by the things I do to add value to tomorrow’s world, today.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
She wrote her grandmother a note and gave it to her. The note read in part, “Grandma, I wrote this note to let you know that I really look up to you. You’re someone that has taught me a lot of good lessons in life. You’re someone that laughs with me, has fun with me, and point out when I’m wrong. You’re my best friend, and I don’t make friends easily or fast. You’re just like a mother to me.”
The note went on to say, “I’ve also included two ribbons with this note. One is for you to keep, to always remind you of how dear you are to me and how much I appreciate and love you.
The second ribbon is for you to pass to someone that you feel has done the things for you that you’ve done for me. By passing on the second ribbon, you’ll also be letting someone know how dear they are to you and you’ll be thanking them for the insight and love that they’ve given you. Grandma, I love you. You’re the best grandma ever!”
So went the note that a 12-year-old girl wrote to her grandma, and the ribbons enclosed, to say thank you for the wisdom, love, inspiration, and insight that her grandma had given her.
Ribbons are also a metaphor for the pathways you’ve traveled as you’ve gone from where you were, to where you are, to where you’ll be. What’s your sense of value and what pathways are you creating for yourself and others to the future?
We all possess value and all of us pass our value to others. Pass your ribbons on … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
It doesn’t take a lot of time or effort to let someone that you’re negotiating with know how much you genuinely appreciate them for whatever value you can point to that adds value to you. By doing so, you’ll invoke the affinity principal (i.e. add perceived value to yourself, while increasing your intrinsic value), which will make you more likeable. That in turn will disallow the other negotiator from being harder on you than he otherwise might have been … and everything will be right with the world.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!