“Failure only becomes exploited once you become its deployment assistant.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert (Click to Tweet)
“This Is The Latest In How To Exploit Negotiation Failure”
People don’t realize; they’re always negotiating.
When was the last time you experienced failure in a negotiation? Do you remember the source of the loss, the emotional feelings you had when you realized you’d failed to achieve the outcome you sought? At some point during the negotiation, did you feel the other negotiator was exploiting you – taking advantage of your good-naturedness or your naivete? If such a recall challenges your memory, you may be failing in more negotiations than you think.
The perception of failure and exploitation in a negotiation is as personal as the individual experiencing it. One thing is for sure when you have the sensation of loss, or that of someone exploiting you, the experience leaves a bitter stain on the reality of your mind. But from within every negotiation failure, success resides. To recognize it, you must clear your mind of the thought of failure. And, you must understand how you arrived at the perspective of being the victim of exploitation. Here’s how to do that.
Mind Control And Perception
Some people don’t recognize when they’re in a negotiation. They may consider it simple talks, an exchange of ideas to reach an amicable outcome – an agreement that satisfies both parties. If that sounds like you or situations you’ve been in, I suggest you reshape your perspective about negotiations. Because when you exchange ideas about an outcome that you and another individual would like to achieve, you’re negotiating. And, to that end, you should be engaging negotiation strategies to reach your end goal. Without that recognition, you are using negotiation strategies in reality, but since your mental perspective is not alert to what you’re doing, you’re not mentally controlling the process you’re using. Those actions are directing you and the person with whom you’re negotiating if he’s not aware of what’s happening either.
I suggest, the first thought you have about avoiding failure in a negotiation is your mindset. That will shape your perspective about the actions in which you engage. More than likely, you won’t get 100% of what you desire, but you will discover something about the strategies you use. And that lesson should help you improve your negotiation skills for future negotiations. Like you do with everything in your life, failure and victory are perceptional. Thus, you control your outcomes by the label you place on them. And that’s the value of having mind control in your negotiations. You get to brand the results of your efforts. Do so wisely, and you’ll never experience failure again. And, if exploitation occurs in your mind, you’ll be controlling it for the betterment of yourself.
Dirty Tricks
Deviousness, unsavory maneuvers, and manipulation can be viewed as dirty tricks when a negotiator feels exploited by such tactics. And yet, what one negotiator may perceive to be a dirty trick, another may perceive as using arrows in his quiver of negotiation tools. So, if you feel that you’re on the end of something that makes you feel uneasy, what might you do? In some cases, you might consider walking away. In other situations, you might confront the offending negotiator and request that he stop the tactics he’s using.
Another point to consider is letting the other negotiator perceive that he’s exploiting you. I suggest doing that to assess how many dirty tricks or ways he might use in his efforts to control you. Try to get him to expose all of his tricks. Then, depending on his negotiator-type, go-along to get-along, someone trying your patience to see what you’ll allow him to get away with, etc., turn the tables on him. In turning the tables on a dirty trickster negotiator, you’d offer him the same deals he extends to you. And if he doesn’t or wouldn’t accept the same types of deals, ask him why you should take them. You’ll be appealing to his sense of fairness. You’ll also be helping yourself avoid failure in the negotiation.
Be mindful of the fact that, if he’s a “don’t give a darn” negotiator, one that’s only out to exploit you for whatever he can get, you’ll have to be very stern with him. That might require you to show your “hard to deal with negotiator persona.” Might that place the negotiation on the path to an impasse, you ask? Yes, it might! But if that’s the case and that becomes a reality, the dilemma might be your walkaway point, thus avoiding failure and the issue of further exploitation.
Spinning The Narrative
Speaking of dirty tricks, some negotiators might consider the following to be one. It’s, spinning the narrative. When some negotiators feel caught by a lousy negotiation outcome, they twist their understanding to escape delivering the agreed-upon results, or they use it to reopen the negotiations. In some situations, the account they provide is the narrative they planned to use to reopen the negotiation all along.
It can be easy for someone to exploit you in a negotiation if you let them. To avoid that from occurring, be aware of what the other negotiator is saying about your offer exchanges. Also, be mindful of what the two of you are agreeing on. And keep your antenna tuned to the slightest misinterpretation or misrepresentation of accounts. If that occurs at any point, it could be the first signal that the other negotiator intends to exploit you when allowed to do so.
Reflection
There are so many opportunities for misperceptions to occur in a negotiation. And that can provide the perfect cover for someone to exploit you and your efforts during your negotiation. To avoid failure and to guard against others that would exploit you during negotiations, be aware of the signs that signal exploitation and those that point to failure due to one’s efforts. By being aware of such movements, you’ll become a more difficult target against whom the other negotiator can perpetrate his dastardly deeds. You’ll also be a more savvy negotiator, which will assist you in avoiding failures. And everything will be right with the world.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!
Listen to Greg’s podcast at https://c-suitenetwork.com/radio/shows/greg-williams-the-master-negotiator-and-body-language-expert-podcast/
After reading this article, what are you thinking? I’d like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
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