“Sunday Negotiation Insight”
“Winning and losing is a state of mind. Always seek to keep your mind in the proper state.” -Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
“You’re a Winner or Loser, Sometimes”
Everyone wins sometimes, and everyone experiences losses. Winning makes most people feel good while losing leaves most in a less exuberant state. The difference in those two states is the perspective from which you view wins and losses. Think about that for a moment. Winning and losing is the opposite of the same coin, and yet, most people view one as good and the other as being bad.
What’s really at the heart of winning and losing? It’s the label we assign to each occurrence that determines how we feel about either. Thus, we should be mindful about the way we think and the labels we assign outcomes.
When you find that you classify an outcome as one that you lose, consider what that thought does to you internally. If it darkens your mood, view it differently. Instead of focusing on the negativity of the outcome, shift your mind to positive aspects of the outcome. If you look deeply enough, you’ll find good in any situation. That good can be used to make you better.
If you alter your perspective about wins and losses and view the latter as points from which to learn and benefit, you’ll begin to view losses as wins, which will improve your outlook on life … and everything will be right with the world.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
If a negotiator views her situation as being untenable, her mental process begins to shift per how she engages in the negotiation. She may shift her focus on thinking of nothing else than how she can salvage any aspect of the negotiation; that thought process may prevent her from observing signals that that might lead to a better negotiation situation.
In a negotiation, always be mindful of how you’re thinking, why you’re thinking in the way you are, and what put you in that state of mind. If such a state is not serving you, alter it. Change it to one that serves you better. A winning outcome, no matter what that outcome is, will be the reward you receive for maintaining control of the way you think about wins and losses.
What’s your opinion? I’d really like to know. Reach me at Greg@TheMasterNegotiator.com
Remember, you’re always negotiating.