“Sunday Negotiation Insight”
“You see the world in part, the way you see yourself. Thus, darkness and light are variables to how you see yourself.” –Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator & Body Language Expert
“Darkness vs. Light – There Are Benefits In Both”
You’re in darkness. What’s the first thought that comes to your mind? Now switch, you’re in the light. What’s the first thought that comes to your mind?
Now contrast the two thoughts you had per when you were in darkness versus light. If you’re like most people, when thinking about being in darkness you thought more gloom and doom, and when thinking of being in the light your thoughts may have been that of happiness, joy, and enlightenment. You may even have thought of seeking a light to help you escape from the dark. The point is when thinking about darkness, more than likely your thoughts were not as airy as they were when thinking about the light.
Here’s something to think about when you consider whether you’re in a dark period or light period in your life. There are benefits to being in either place, mentally. Sometimes we need to be in the dark to see the light and sometimes we need to seek the darkness to escape the light. Being in one environment versus the other allows us to think differently.
Since we give meaning to what occurs to us, and then we act based on the meaning we give an occurrence, that implies that we can choose how we’ll react to anything that occurs to us. In reality, that’s exactly what we do. We choose how we’re going to act and then we do so.
In the future, when you perceive yourself to be in the dark, don’t despair. Instead, seek the benefits of being there. It just might turn out to be the light you’re looking for that’s showing itself in an unexpected form. When lying in the dark you can come up with thoughts that may lead you to the light.
What does this have to do with negotiations?
In negotiations, we come upon times that we might deem to be dark; such might be an impasse, points of strong contention, etc. If you alter your perspective, per what you’re experiencing and focus on the potential advantages of your current position, you might find hidden benefits that neither you nor the other negotiator considered. It’s always the mindset that directs your actions in a negotiation. Seek a different mindset when you’re in the dark and can’t find a light to guide you forward, and you might expose the situation to the greater light of possibilities … and everything will be right with the world.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!